Ask Yourself Who Are You Really?

I was born with the darkest of black hair and lots of it, it wasn't until I was about 4 that my twin and I started looking nothing like little identical monkeys and that started to sadden me. Who was I? if I wasn't like someone else? 
If I was to make a confession it was that I really wanted to be as headstrong as her, always had a stable job always learning and studying savings for a car a house.. the way we were all taught to think that this was the way life was supposed to go that we all needed a "plan" but I
 could never concentrate for very long and I always needed to be moving or i would become frustrated, I never found myself being patient.

Ok but I was talking to my best friend who is a million miles away with a time difference that sucks but I was in the shower and she was in bed and she found herself saying that she's been loving other people more then she's been loving herself and I started to think have i been doing the same thing? how are we meant to find and figure ourselves out if we're too busy dissecting the people around us.  " i don't know who I am " is a question I hear come out of a lot of mouths, our dreams, memories, intentions, the want for something more.. all make up for tiny bits of who we are, right?

I mean don't get me wrong I'm a huge believer of surrounding yourself with people who have the same hopes and dreams the same thrive for doing something good in the world, but when do we know when to stop and to just take a step back to reflect on ourselves? there's not one person I'm friends with who don't support me and don't lift me up instead of dragging me down and I couldn't ask for anything more but am I selfish for wanting more love than I already have or is that what makes us human?

Yeah so I don't dress the same as I did a year ago, I don't listen to the same music, i don't shop at high-end stores and I'm almost a year and half at the being vegetarian benchmark, but are all of these things trends? do they throw us into a category? i live in a pair of converse i found for $3 at an op shop, my first pair of levis have 6 holes in them, I throw on shirts and silk dresses not because it's trendy but because I'm lazy and its what makes me feel comfortable.

There's magic in everything we find ourselves in and i find a new piece of my personality every day, a new sense of style, a song I've never heard, food I've never tried, a new dream and want and if we new ourselves entirely already then how we would we discover these new parts of who we are.
How can i love the city and the beach the exact same amount as each other, how can I be so conflicted but so sure of myself at the same time.

The best advice I was given was 'never grow up too fast', chase the feeling inside of you, experience everything and never be afraid of your fears.

So why you still have time go lose yourself,
you never know you might find out who you are along the way.

Let's take it back to the beginning, when i was standing in Midwest trader searching high and low for a good pair of vintage levis and couldn't find anything that hugged my tiny booty tight enough, that's when my friend told me about Luna Wolf Vintage.
Ali and i first met on a rooftop over some pineapple vodkas * how cliche of me * when we started bantering about a mutual hate here and a future plan to live with each other one day there, and then it clicked where we knew each other from and the friendships been nothing but sunflowers and daisies ever since.

I had no idea she owned or created this slice of heaven until I stumbled upon the little gem by accident above a rad store and tucked away above a staircase.
It became my hideaway and we began to talk about shoots together and who would be good to shoot and then i decided to jump behind the camera for her and in return she would give me a rad Harley shirt or the infamous daisy flares everyone's mouths watered over at splendour.

It's incredible how much I've watched this store grow, from the people Luna wolf has collaborated with and the people they have been able to meet through having such a rad and unique attitude about the brand.
I mean after all its Adelaide and we all help each other out it's what a tiny city that call each other family do.

The shops sadly closed  but you can check everything out on their online store
Photos By Daniel Marks @markseee

It's 8:30am on a Wednesday and I'm basking in the morning sunlight, i read my horoscope just like i do every morning, sipping instant coffee from a ' CHICKS RULE ' mug and eating peanut butter and strawberry jam on toast? it's my new obsession.
I started writing this on my velvet green couch in the lounge room but I decided to follow the sunlight to my bed to continue rambling on about how busy and happy I've been these past few months and how my todo list is almost all ticked off.
Firstly i turned 20 surrounded by the most amazing friends, saying goodbye to my teen years.. the years that have moulded me into the shrub i am today, wondering off to Splendour and playing hide and seek for almost two weeks on the coast.
Monday-itis is real folks.
I've helped out friends with two short films ( I'm finally acting and it feels so sweet ).
This blog is also getting a workout as I'm putting work in, trying to connect with you all and share my thoughts, creativity and what i love to do.
Collaborating with friends and brands, creating my own style and still discovering new things about myself.
I finally have SAVINGS something i thought i would never be able to say, i also get my license in minus 16 days and i can't wait to drive to the beach every morning in summer.
Everything finally feels like it's falling into place and people need to know that when the time is right you'll know.
I mean i can't afford to fix my phone, i have really bad cramps and i messed up and i cant afford a flight home after listen out but im genuinly, happy.

We're all on our own journey of self-expression, exploring the world within ourselves and the one that we live in.
We start to fill our head full of questions and dreams, wondering where the road beneath your feet is bound to take you. You feel stuck in a place you're constantly caught up daydreaming in, forgetting that the whole world is at your fingertips.
It's easy to feel glued to the past and reminiscing on what could've been instead of what can be, craving attention and addicted to the feeling of love.
It's easy to feel alone when everyone and everything around you 
seems to be going a million miles an hour, when you're desperately holding on to someone or something that bleeds of good energy.
Why is the glass always half empty instead of half full? why are we depressed about the past and terrified of the future? when it once was exactly that.
Find the person of your dreams and hold on tight, never settle for anything less 
than what you deserve. Life is one big magical dream and its okay to be scared, nervous.. to feel butterflies in the pit of your stomach and to have your heart pounding in your chest.
Talk to strangers, dance like no one is watching, wear your heart on your sleeve and never look back, laugh, cry, sleep for two days straight or don't sleep at all. 
This very moment the one were in this is all we have, talk about things that matter tell the people you care about that you love them, let a stranger know they're 
tell yourself that you're beautiful.
Ask yourself, are you happy?


Just like how i started it off last year, my heads full to the brim of memories and spilling everywhere... i feel like i was wearing those kaleidoscope glasses where ever i went because it all felt like one huge magical dream.

This year felt like no other, the weather was impeccable and it made me feel like I
 was an animated Disney princess where everything was perfect and nothing was going to rain on my parade... it never did not once. 

It's always like walking into one big confetti cake and I'd love to say that it didn't take Kiah and I seven hours to find our campsite on the Thursday night or that i woke up fresh without a hang over but that's not the case and if anyone ever tells you different then they're lying but I there is a truth and here it is....

It's never been just a festival to me and its so easy to loose yourself and be in a self indulged trance for 3 days as you really fall into being who you truly are being wissped away by how real everyone is, the music, the people the energy... how comfortable you are in your own skin, its
such an addictive feeling. You have this whole weekend this one weekend to be your true self to float away and have your head in the clouds.

I'm currently buzzing around in my own head trying to pick out the most delicious and juicy things to tell you all but I'm going to jumble the things that stand out the most.... ready set SPAGHETTI.
My Dearest friend played on stage with flume, I witnessed a robbery, i laid down with 40 people on a pink floating circle at 4am ( the party came to the street ) i rode a bike and fell off, Kiah and I made plans to get married but we missed our own wedding, i had a massive school girl crush on a boy ( correction i still have that crush ), I rollie pollied down the massive hill and successfully made it to the bottom, I got a lift in a wheelbarrow, Tommy gave me a hat he guarded with his life, I stayed up until 6am and talked to a guy who was proposing to his girlfriend that day ... they met 5 years ago at splendour and it was her birthday.

I feel so blessed this year to have been surrounded by the most selfless warmhearted incredible people, they all deserve a huge shout out.. it would not be splendour without them radiating energy and the unforgettable vibes that were floating around our campsite and on top of the hill.

Renee, Lewis, Kiah, Britt, Darcy, Daijah, Haley, Hannah, Lili, Jamie, Pat, Jade, Colby, Jake, Charlie, Tim, Carl, Tom, Matt, Sammy, Harriet, Mossop, Jalala, Mathias, Jordy, Emmanual, Baro, Fergus, Mich, Jono, Claire, Lucie, Sav, Emma, jack, Sara, Liss, Edwina, Tommy & Hons.

To everyone that made this weekend worth wild, full of love and a reason worth smiling for then thank you to the stars and back.. words can't explain how full i am with love 

Make it your lives resolution to go to Splendour every year until you can't walk anymore and then get in a wheelchair make no excuses and keep going, this place is full of magic and hillsides full of nothing but fairy dust and the sounds of laughs where dreams come true.
We all come from different parts of the coast to reunite year after 
year again and again, were all best friends and forever joint at the hip for the very same reason for that we love music and being surrounded with the purest of happiness.

Hello I'm terribly sorry for running away and hiding in wonderland in a big rabbit hole rolling around in glitter but i have been day dreaming about July and holding on really tightly to every day in the past month, I've been feeling a lot like cinderella when finally her wish comes true and she is given a beautiful dress and the night of what only dreams are made of.

I'm finally back in Adelaide after wondering half way across the east coast and back, tiptoeing around like a little glitter fairy at 
splendour and shaking my tail feathers with a zillion of my most cherished friends on my birthday.
I've gone from running around in a million layers of clothes to prancing up and down green grassy hills and a night sky full of stars in my underwear, I'm still unpacking and making a glittery mess of everything i pull out of my suitcase... but who's complaining?
It feels like I'm sprinkling a little bit of magic where ever i go.

ATTENTION, please!!!
I've been dawdling around 
and i was going to wait until i had a huge group photo of everyone i cherish but I'm really impatient and I'll burst if I don't get this floating bubble of love out of my head soon...

I've been pondering about how blessed and out of this 
world lucky
i am to have such incredible, warmhearted, weird little rascals in my life.
I never thought I
would be sitting here today falling crazy in love, wth my group of friends and the beautiful people I've crossed paths with, the doors that have been opened the smiles and laughs I've shared ad the moments i have saved in my little memory bank.

So this cheesy little word vomit goes out to 
everyone I'v
e boogied, wiggled and giggled with. you all know who you are, old and new i love you all the same.

I spent a massive eight days in Melbourne, running around with Daijah making memories with some of our friends who played at the corner hotel... so we ended up being recognized by the security guard almost every night. Embarrassing or an achievement? 3 Gigs 48 Dinners New friends Bars & Bars Plenty of bagels and coffee and one empty bank.
I didn't want this blog post to be taken over by photos but more so the memories that were made in the short time span I was there that i will never forget, I mean I ate 30 dumplings for $10?
QUICK TIP -Don't catch Melbourne's trains past 2am!!!

 I met a deliciously cute dog named max, rolled in glitter from head to toe and was called short by the bottle-o guy, what a day you were GTM I've never GROOVED so hard and i couldn't thank you enough. 
YOO HOO Alex thank you for owning a convertible and being a part of the Brady bunch, I felt like we were one giant cake being baked in 
fun fettie oven. Sloppy McDonald drive-thrus and making friends in traffic, Stealing all the mustard sauce and a random lemonade can. Being proposed to with a can of beer " oh will you beer mine 4 ever ".
Coming back to the oh so saucy ALLYOUCANEAT-CLUB for a nifty after party in the green room with acts like AlisonWonderland, WhatSoNot, Golden Features, Safia, The Meeting Tree, The Rubens & ODESZA.
A major shout out to my little angel Sasha you know who you are, none of this would
 have been possible without you being a Groovie Smoothie.

You were an incredibly delicious day cooked in a giant oven this year, the heat of the day was forgotten about the moment we planted our butts on the grass and our feet in the dirt where we shook our tail feathers from the moment the sun rose to the moment it set back down to go back to bed again.
spicy pre's with the best fam and a slippery bus ride to get us to where we need to be, Jo if you're reading this you should've worn your silk Pajamas.
The acts were even more insane then my day had just become, from Methyl Ethel to DMA's, The Internet, Hermitude, Violent Soho, Grimes, Chvrches, The Smith St band....and last but not least FLUME.
I'll run around and play lottery with Tori hand in hand all day long whilst we end it with a game of wheres Riki and day of the week.

Photo credit to the lovely Mathias Alexandrou.
What a tiny tinsel town you are Currumbin, you can eat me up and spit me back out anytime you want. From Adelaide to Melbourne, Melbourne to Sydney, Sydney to Brisbane on a terrifying redirected flight with some not very tasteful weather outside we finally wiggled our butts into the beautiful town on the Gold Coast full of just as many beautiful people and beaches.

Day 1.  Wake up its time to go fall asleep on the beach and wake up redder than a spicy lobster, oh how incredible the first day was and always will be from the ocean to rock pools... giant boxes of fruit and vegetables to natural aloe vera plants and coconut oil to soothe every inch of my body.  
A shower with a delightful view to 
end the day and a bowl of fruit and peanut butter toast will do the trick, every time.
Day 2 -  You're all at work or swimming in waterfalls and I'm only just waking up on the couch burning from head to toe after yesterday dose of the sun... off to lunch we go, how about soul bowl and a bit of bowie for the drive? The is insane excuse me why i wander off into my own little world.

Get home everyone is time to watch a movie about a mop while we smother ourselves in whole food chocolates and goji berries.
Gather all the housemates together after 
its the last night the Adelaide wombats are going to be in town, Indian for dinner and a game of phone stack to keep us all connected one last time.
One order of PAPADAMNS? 
A massive vegetarian dish with a side of BYO red wine. Before bed lets all play a game of who can scare crispy or Whitney the most, a message and back crack from the infamous Jordy whilst everyone crashes on the couch piled on top of each other. 

Day 3 - The last a final day of this two week long trip ( ps. sorry to be only sharing small but huge parts ) once again we woke up and drove straight to the nearest coffee shop and beach, could I get any more burnt? I don't want to leave please someone tell me to stay because I will.
Its 12pm we've been at the beach since 9 and its time to get on the Gold coast to Brisbane airport train,
i miss everyone already someone let me off of the train.
superstillwhilei read the second-hand book I bought in Sydney, this train taking forever but the view is nothing like I've seen before. I'm at the airport now I go to sit down and buy a veggie paste I notice a german girl here on holiday so we sit down and talk for half an hour... I hear the last boarding call and run before the gates shut, time seems to be flying ... more than literally.
It was 10 o'clock at night and I had set of into the night on a long but delicious nine hour drive with the destination of Melbourne being in my hands.From the dreamy sunrise to the morning dew and mist, nothing had me ready for the day i was about to embark on.
My spicy friend tom was performing at Listen Out and had snagged me a pass so I was able to dance away into the night. From Childish Gambino, SBTRKT... Alison Wonderland, Joey Badass and of course Golden Features.
I couldn't believe that I would be at a festival with so many people I cherish none the less of 24 hours the day before hand.

I'm so excited to venture off into a wild and unfamiliar place, ready to meet new people and dive into a new world.
One long but delicious flight with four of my beautiful bambinos, a two hour road trip later we finally arrived in Currumbin valley. Brisbane at around 3am.
is where i would snuggle a house full of spicy friends until the sun would return so we could go stock up for a crazy weekend ahead. Gum boots
and rain coats at the ready we set off on a journey, leaving glitter where ever we go. 

Well tickle me pink what an absolute mess this weekend has been, from the greenest grass I've ever seen to the sludgiest mud I've ever swam in .. and yes i literally mean swam, there was no escaping it.
Jumping onto the splendour band
wagon with more than two
hand full of friends and most importantly the little dweeb Daijah who managed to scurry her way into the camping grounds. Here are some photos and memories from spending one of the worlds most loved and famous festivals with some of my best friends.

                                         DAY ONE
It's not even day two yet and I've already found myself covered in mud and smelling like a little swamp animal, I don't even know where to start but ill put on some fresh socks and my gumboots while we wait for the first act.
Let's all
hoola dance with the man who has a fake beard and playing air guitar.
Ailish, Lucie, Daijah
andi managed to stumble upon some lovely dudes whilst we sat up until 6am charging our phones with numerous strangers phones. SHNOOKUMS oh how I miss you.
Boots and cats and massages are always a treat, along with free pizza from the guy who feels sorry for us cold kids. ( Forever a hero )


                                       DAY TWO
What an epic day yesterday was i can only hope for the same today, my legs are tired and weak from pulling them out of the mud all day and my hairs covered in sludge and god knows what plus I'm drenched in rain water but hand me the Vegemite and an avocado and ill be as good as gold.
SO FAR SO GOOD, we have managed to see multiple acts, roll down hills, shower and use Pams Pamper Parlour so we were feeling FRESH.
Daijah got in contact with AlisonWonderlandandi
managed to run into a thousand and one friends
i never get to see so I couldn't be happier frolicking in my fringe skirt and rainbow scarf.
Carbonara for dinner anyone? A shoulder ride on Daijah to say hello to my boys from circa waves? thank you for the inch of extra height.

                                  DAY 3
How incredible day three has been, acts after acts meeting new people and finding someone camping with some of my best friends WHO i went to kinder garden with and have not seen in 15 years?? TAME IMPALA you will float my boat every damn time, how beautiful your set was and yours to Wombats.
In the arms of the beautiful Brittany Odell all night whilst we frolicked through the 
city Tipi Forrest.
At last midnight coffee and then a boogie in the silent disco where ill meet Mitch and steal giant letters off of the "knit happens sew what " sign.
all crawl into the same bed tonight, 1,2,3,4,5? 6? girls in a one man tent later and were fast asleep dreaming of the days we just had.

1am - 2am shnookums with Ailish, Jordy & myself with a wicked boots and cats rapping legend.
The OH SO VERY TALENTED, Kyle Lionhart & Ziggy Alberts absolutely killing the game.
 ( Click on their names )
Feeling oh so 
very lucky that I got the chance to hang with these rad dudes in between jamming in the mud.
Ifyouhavent heard their stuff already then
youre missing out BIG TIME.